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Sunday, 01 November 2009
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Notes on Jack's Life by Douglas Gresham ....
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Hello Friend! Notes on … Jack’s Life by Douglas Gresham … November 3, 2009
… Stepson to His Beloved Mentor, C.S. Lewis, Doug writes this Life Story from a personal “at home” perspective
Introduction … Several biographies have been written of C. S. Lewis’ life and accomplishments but none of them have addressed the MAN at home with his family … as well as the professor and world speaker and writer of Narnia series.
Chapter 1 … Early Days and Worms … If you are about 8 years old, then you are the same age I was when I first met the man who wrote the Chronicles of Narnia. If you are 18, then you are the age I was when he died; and if you’re a 60, then you are about the same age as I am now. But whatever age you are, if you are someone who reads, then the chances are that you have read something by C. S. Lewis; and if you haven’t, then you have a great feast of reading yet before you.
His real name was Clive Staples Lewis. But that wasn’t his fault! As a small boy he simply refused to answer to any name other than “Jacksie”, the name of a small dog he liked. Later he came to be known as Jack. He was born in Strandtown, a suburb of Belfast in Northern Ireland in 1898 before washing machines or electricity. His parents, Albert and Flora, and his older brother, Warren born in 1895, known as “Warnie,” had five servants – a cook, a housemaid, a gardener, a nursemaid, and a governess. With no refrigeration the milk, butter, cream, eggs and cheeses were brought daily to the house. The butcher and the baker, fishmonger and “greengrocer” would call at the house several times a week. The fresh food was healthy and had to be used promptly or preserved in some way, salt or vinegar and sugar.
There were almost no cars so they would roll hoops around for outside exercise after strolling over the property. His mother died of cancer in 1908. Jack was desolate. Albert’s own father had died earlier that year and his brother died just ten days after Flora and he did not handle it all very well. He had no idea how to cope with the household and his family so Jack was sent away to school, joining Warnie at Wynyard across the sea in England. During the next several years this school deteriorated under the supervision of an insane headmaster who often beat the students. Jack was brought back to his hometown of Belfast for a half term at Campbell College (that’s where Eugenius goes in Odyssey episodes by Focus on the Family
. For college Jack and Warnie were sent off to Malvern and Cherbourg.
Chapter 2 … The Beginning of Wisdom … Travel by ship from Belfast to Liverpool, Warnie always got dreadfully seasick as Jack felt guilty for enjoying the journey! Jack always enjoyed reading and writing much more than math. He read way ahead of his age with a taste in literature becoming quite widespread. He and Warnie would go to “The Hippodrome” for light entertainment variety until an acrobat fell and was severely injured. He could never relax again at any of the presentations so his anxiety ruined his enjoyment. He despised the practice of the schools making the junior students servants of the senior students. His analytical mind assumed if he couldn’t prove it, it wasn’t so. He decided to apply that to God also. He spent many years as an agnostic.
Chapter 3 … Daring, Duty, and Despair … While Jack was learning and growing, so was World War I. Warnie had gone off to become a career soldier. Now it was Jack’s turn to decide what he was to do with his life. He wanted to attend Oxford but he didn’t have the money. If Jack stayed in England, he was likely to be drafted. If he returned to Ireland, he would not have to fight in the war. He joined the Royal Army Service Corps thinking that he could be an interpreter if he never got into Oxford. I was self-taught in several languages. He sat for several exams and eventually earned a scholarship to University College Oxford. The soldiers would read books in an effort to take their minds away from the horrible war. There were dreary hours of inactivity between the frenzied bouts of savage fighting. Jack was eventually hit by both the concussion and shrapnel from a British shell. His trusted sergeant was between him and the shell and was blown to bits. The shell had fallen short of its German trenches target!
Chapter 4 … The Start of the Beginning … Jack was sent back to England in May of 1918 to recover from shrapnel in his chest, left thigh and the back of his left hand. Of his group of five friends at University Jack was the only one who had survived what he saw as a senseless war that had taken SO many young lives! After a year on the college campus he found a house to provide for Mrs. Moore. In March of 1919 he published his book, Spirits in Bondage, and by the end of April 1920 he had won a first-class degree in classical honors moderations. He was living in constant poverty as his scholarship was not sufficient for his expenses in helping to look after Mrs. Moore and Maureen as he had promised their Paddy just before he died.
Chapter 5 … The Kilns … About 800 years ago, Oxford became a city of learning. Colleges were founded and stone was needed for building. Stonecutters established a quarry near the village of Headington and a new village of sorts was established to house the workers. The horses in the quarry needed blacksmiths and the kilns were established. Pubs were provided for food and spirits. The stone turned out to be not as good as other sources but the town had developed and they needed a place of worship. By 1920 the manager of the kilns used for making bricks had a house built which he called “The Kilns” from the outset. The house and kilns were eventually purchased with combined funds provided by Mrs. Moore and Jack and Warnie. At Mrs. Moore’s death the house would go to Jack and at Jack and Warnie’s deaths the house would go to Maureen. The site has been restored to a likeness of when Jack lived there. The Aga cooking stove people have provided a new stove for the restoration by the C. S. Lewis Foundation of Redlands CA.
Chapter 6 … Friends and Family … Rooms were added to the house at The Kilns and Mrs. Moore usually had one or two rooms rented to help with finances. Many interesting people came through over the years … some were students Jack could teach and some were temporary peers. Mrs. Moore was the age of Jack’s mother and basically was always ill with something a treated Jack as her slave. This angered Warnie. One roomer was a doctor who dabbled in the occult and started to have episodes that increasingly got more violent. Jack eventually had to hold him down and they decided to commit him to a mental institution. Jack’s health was not the best and he was often sick and depressed. These responsibilities for Mrs. Moore and her daughter Maureen, ten years Jack’s junior, depleted his psychological resources. He frequently had bad headaches and his digestion was poor but he never seemed morose in the presence of others! He stuffed it down and began to have his own nightmares which author Douglas attributes to the COLD house.
Chapter 7 … At Home at Last … Warnie and Jack’s father passed on and in April 1930 they went together to Little Lea in order to sort out all of the family treasures and chattels that had accumulated in the household all of their lives. Frederick Paxford was hired to maintain the property from landscaping to water supply to building maintenance to vehicle service to household shopping by auto or bicycle.
Chapter 8 … Friends and Good Fellowship … The word “inkling” means a sort of vague idea as in “I don’t have the faintest inkling!” Jack was not really a “club” minded person, but he joined a selection of clubs and societies at the university in order to spend time with people who were interested in, and could talk about, the same things that he himself enjoyed. The Inkling Club met Monday and Thursday evenings. Nothing lasts forever, and this time of relative peace and quiet at The Kilns was, like all other times, passing. Outside the quiet and peace of Oxford and The Kilns, major events and changes were taking place. Dark and evil clouds gathered in the minds of men, countries began to prepare once again, after such a short time, for that which all men should learn to hate and fear, WAR!
Chapter 9 … Once More into Darkness … World War II was SO different from World War I. Oh, that generals would figure that one out! Blackout times increased throughout the conflicts. Several students came to live at The Kilns because youth were sent out of the cities as a result of the bombings. Jack had many speaking engagements with the English servicemen. They seemed to appreciate stories of his WWI experiences and his positive perspectives.
Chapter 10 … Moving On … Jack, now 47 years old, had worked heroically throughout the war years and was completely drained of all energy by the beginning of 1946. Plagues with headaches, suffering from nightmares, and always feeling desperately tired, he was often ill, sometimes seriously. Every flu virus or infection that went around the neighborhood seemed to attack him, and he had not the physical strength to resist them. Living as he had for long years on a poor diet and constantly overworked, he was not only tire but also very weak.
In 1940 he published a book called The Problem of Pain, which looked at the age-old question of why God allows us to suffer. Jack understood pain fairly well. He had the unusual ability to study what was happening all around him and indeed within him and then to write a careful account of it in a form that was easy to read and useful to other people. Warnie had become an alcoholic. Jack fussed and fretted over others and their challenges and took care of everyone around him as much as he was able. Warnie was often hospitalized with alcohol poisoning. He was very frustrated because he saw Jack as taken advantage of by so many people. Jack’s nightmares continued to include many lions, but especially one lion in particular … He was LARGE and had a distinct personality. Slowly his mental pictures of the faun with his parcels and the lion began to come together in his mind. It grew gradually at first but soon took off and flowed from his pen. He included characters from ancient mythology and from the fields and hedgerows of the countryside of both Ireland and England. There was great good and desperate evil, treachery and heroism, the things of which all great tales are made. Jack’s friend, J.R.R. Tolkien discouraged Jack from publishing The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe in 1950 but Jack continually encouraged Tolkien to publish his Lord of the Rings. In 1950 Jack received his first letter from a Mrs. Joy Gresham of upstate New York. In 1951 he released Prince Caspian and in 1952 he finished Mere Christianity and The Voyage of the Dawn Treader. In 1953 The Silver Chair was published.
Chapter 11 … Aga’pe, Phile’o, Storge’, and Eros … Following many letters Jack and Joy met for the first in 1952. She was divorced from a man she called the beast for his abusive behaviors. She was a mental match for the VERY bright Jack and moved to England. Jack believed that one of the failings of the English language is the fact that we have only one word for love. The ancient Greeks used four. He wrote a book about the four words for love entitled The Four Loves. She was 37 when they first met and he was nearly 54. Her parents were Jewish but brought up her and her younger brother, Howard, to be atheists. She wrote Smoke on the Mountain which was published in 1953 and is still in print today.
Jack was in the habit of giving away two-thirds of his book income that he used to pay school fees for Joy’s two young American boys at an English boarding school. The men at Oxford long considered Jack as decidedly odd for his strong and public Christianity. In 1954 Cambridge University offered Jack what is known as the “chair” (professorship) of Medieval and Renaissance English Literature. It was a new chair and was created to fill a need and with Jack in mind for the job. At first he told them his responsibilities at Oxford made it impossible for him to accept. Cambridge finally convinced Jack that he could go home to Oxford and The Kilns over the weekends and holidays and he accepted.
In 1956 the British Home Office decided that Joy’s visitor’s visa was not going to be renewed and that she would have to take her two boys and go back to America! It was a terrible blow to Joy. Jack could only think of one way of preventing her deportation back to America, so he offered to undergo a civil marriage ceremony with her to extend to her the legal formality of his British citizenship. They continued to live separately until her pain in her hip got so bad that her leg actually gave out and broke. It was discovered she had cancer. By March 1957 they had given up all hope for her recovery.
On March 21 Jack and Joy were properly married IN the hospital room by a former pupil of Jack’s, a good and true friend, Peter Bide, who had become a priest of the Anglican Church. Jack prayed for her healing but Joy was sent back to The Kilns to die in peace but she got better instead! God snatched Joy back from the jaws of death and gave them to each other so that they could spend a few years together in the kind of happiness that neither of them had ever experienced before! These two, who already had a firm base of three kinds of love to build on, built one of the liveliest of love stories on the ashes of forlorn hopes! But in October of 1959 her cancer returned. She was so ill but they made a trip to Greece visiting most of the mythological sites. They returned to The Kilns desperately TIRED but happy. Two and one-half months later, on Wednesday, July 13, 1960, Joy died and Jack’s grief was absolutely overpowering. He picked up his pen and an old exercise book and began to write.
Chapter 12 … Home at Last … Jack had passed through the trap of self-reliant atheism to find his way to Christ. He sat at his desk and wrote what he was feeling. A Grief Observed soon came out under the pen name N.W. Clerk meaning no one knows the writer. It wasn’t until after Jack himself had died that it appeared under his own name. On Friday, November 22, 1963, the famous writer Aldous Huxley died. On the same day in Dallas, Texas, President John F. Kennedy was shot dead. Also on the same day at 5:34 p.m., C. S. Lewis died at his much loved home. Douglas Gresham, his step-son and author of this book being noted, says he was the finest man he ever knew in his life, and he misses him to this day! But he continues that Jack was ready to go. He had done all he wanted to do and he had said all that he wanted to say; and more important still, God was ready to take him home!
Jack left behind Warnie who lived another ten years, a broken, sad and lonely old man. Maureen Moore inherited the property according to the agreement made back in 1930. She sold everything to developers. The house is now restored and has become a residential center for serious scholars studying Jack, his works, and theology. The house itself actually looks better and is in better condition today than it has been since the 1960s. The one place Jack loved which does not shrink, is Narnia! “ Narnia just keeps getting bigger and better as we all go further up and further in,” says our great author of this work, Douglas Gresham, in 1997, 2000 and 2003. Find MORE details IN this great book!!
Blessings on EVERYONE until we touch base again next week. I use Tuesday dates but often post before that on www.xanga.com/CampMumma and www.Facebook.com/Darlene J. Ranck Mumma.
DJRMum
Monday, 26 October 2009
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Notes on ... My Grandmother's Stories ... by Adele Geras
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Corn & Alfalfa Hay, Trucking, Day Care, Van Transport, ESL Tutoring, Prayer Support, Random Poems
64 Warbling Canaries, 10 + 2 Caprines, 3 Felines, +Worms/Bait Fish/Crickets/Shrimp
JoDa-NeTaDaAaEtRy-*-JoLoAnTaKyAl-JoMeAlMa-*-LoJoHaLa Campers
(John) & Darlene June (Ranck) Mumma, 6 children, 51 international students and 45 MH/MR foster teens and children
580 Mumma Road, Lititz PA 17543-9403 (717) 626-4359
www.Xanga.com/CampMumma www.Facebook.com/Darlene J. Ranck Mumma DJRMum@dejazzd.com
Hello Friend! Notes on … My Grandmother’s Stories ,,, October 27, 2009
… A Collection of Jewish Folk Tales by Adele Geras …
Illustrated by Jael Jordan … (Jael is also the name of my niece Sarah and Patrick Sear’s daughter
Introduction … A day with Grandmother is always a joy. There are tasty things to eat and interesting things to do, and best of all, there are Grandmother’s stories. Inspired by ordinary treasures in her apartment – a button box in the bedroom, an embroidered shawl in the parlor, freshly baked strudel in the kitchen – the stories are rooted in the lore of Grandmother’s Russian Jewish heritage, and they are all fascinating.
They range far and wide, from ancient Jerusalem, where King Solomon teaches a miser to be generous, to the Russian country side, where a clever peasant outwits the Czar, and all the way to the mythical village of Chelm, where the Chief Sage keeps his shoes from getting muddy by wearing them – where else? – on his hands! There is a story about a rabbi, a story about a ghost bride, even a story about a kvetch who meets an angel. Each is instruction; each is a sheer delight.
Adele Geras’s deftly written text, which interweaves ten traditional Jewish stories with the narrative of a young girl visiting her grandmother, is just right for reading aloud. Adele was born in Jerusalem and spent her childhood in many countries, including North Borneo and Gambia. She has been a singer, an actress, and a teacher of French. Among her books for children are Nursery School Rabbit and Voyage. The latter, like My Grandmother’s Stories, is based on the family history of Eastern European Jewish immigrants. Adele Geras lives in Manchester, England.
This book has been illustrated with wonderful skill and feeling by Jael Jordan. She was born in England and spent part of her childhood in Israel. She studied design and illustration in London, where he has been a printmaker, a teacher, and an illustrator of both adult and children’s books. Jael Jordan lives in London.
1. Bavsi’s Feast … This guy was ultra STINGY! His name came to be used for extremes … ‘evil as Bavsi’ or ‘stingy as Bavsi’. A famine came into the land but Bavsi would NOT share his granaries with anyone! King Solomon heard of this miserable miser and sent his royal Chamberlain to invite him to a feast at the palace. Bavsi was ecstatic! Who else had EVER been invited to the palace by King Solomon? He decided not to eat that day before going to the palace. That way he would have more room for all the royal delicacies!
But there were some provisos, distinct royal etiquette. He had to PROMISE to NEVER ask for anything, never utter any complaints, and always give nothing but compliments for all courses of the meal! Bavsi was the only guest at this feast and he was told all would be ready in an hour. Time moved on and Bavsi was famished! The first course was soup but a soon as the bowl was served another servant immediately picked it up at took it away! This continued for ALL courses from whole fish baked in vine leaves and laid on rice, roasted meats, cakes dripping with honey and studded with nuts, velvety fruits with luscious juices … he didn’t get to eat anything! Then King Solomon had his stay to listen to music for the evening and then overnight too! He had to keep complimenting everything! When he finally returned to his house the next morning he opened the granary doors to share his corn with the poor and never again sold food to starving people to make a profit for himself! Wise King Solomon!!
2. The Faces of the Czar … In a faraway neglected corner of Russia, about a day’s ride from the Czar’s Summer Palace, there lived a farmer called Frankel. He spent a lot of time digging up his turnips. One day he was so focused on his work that he did not hear the approach of the hoof beats of the horse ridden by the Czar. The Czar had a question for him. “Why is the hair on your head gray while the hair of your beard is still black?” the Czar queried. Frankel replied, “I am only a poor Jewish farmer, but the reason is this. The hairs on my head started growing when I was born. Those on my chin only started growing when I was thirteen years old, after the bar mitzvah ceremony at which I became a man. Therefore the hairs of my beard are younger.”
The Czar was so amazed at the answer to a question he had puzzled over for so LONG! He had Frankel promise to NEVER tell anyone the answer to the query. Frankel promised to never tell anyone until he had seen the Czar’s face a hundred times! So the Czar rode on chuckling to himself. He asked all of his chief advisers the answer to his query. They had NO clue why he wondered but as they talked among themselves they recalled that the Czar had recently taken a solo ride to the country. It was a rainy, muddy day but they decided to ride in that same direction hoping to find the answer to the question. They eventually came across Frankel and explained their search.
Frankel explained that the Czar had indeed been riding that way several weeks earlier (on a sunny day) but he was not a liberty to tell the answer to the question. They asked if there was anything they could do to persuade him to change his mind? He replied that 100 silver rubles could convince him to change his mind immediately! They scared them up and prepared to hear the answer to the riddle. They returned and answered the Czar. He was totally FURIOUS when he learned Frankel had spilled the beans! He sent for his Chief of Police and went after Frankel. Frankel forthwithly pulled out the 100 silver rubles given him by the chancellors … 100 faces of the Czar! The Czar was SO impressed with Frankel’s sharp wits that he fired all of his advisers and appointed Frankel his ONLY adviser guaranteeing him he would never want for anything. Frankel lived to a ripe old age and became the richest and most powerful man in Russia, next only to the Czar himself!
3. The Golden Shoes … Chelm is a small town in the middle of Poland, or perhaps Hungary. It is a magic place so you can’t find it on the map. Everyone who ever lived in the town was a fool. Even the wives and children were fools, dolts, idiots and simpletons too. They had a “Council of Wise Men” who appointed one among them to be Chief Sage. They decided he should wear a special pair of golden shoes whenever he walked about the town so everyone would know he was NOT an ordinary citizen.
Often it was muddy so no one knew he was special because the mud covered the golden shoes. So he wore boots but they no one could see the golden shoes anyway. So they bored holes in the boots so the golden color would peek through but the mud filled up the holes. Now he walks around with the shoes on his hands!
There are many stories from Chelm but here is a very short one. Yankel queried, “When you drop a piece of buttered bread on the floor which side will be on the bottom?” Mandel said, “It can fall either way! Yankel determined that the buttered side always fell downward because of the weight of the butter. To prove himself right he dropped one and the buttery side was on the top!! Mandel gloated, “See, it can fall either way!” “Nonsense,” said Yankel. “It was my fault. I made a mistake. I buttered the wrong side, that’s all!”
4. The Tablecloth … Each story gets better and better. Adele is writing as a small girl visiting her Grandmother. You simply must get the book (or borrow it from my Camp Mumma Library) for the rest of these intriguing accounts!
5. A Tangle of Wools …
6. Saving the Pennies …
7. The Garden of Talking Flowers …
8. The Market of Miseries …
9. An Overcrowded House …
10. A Phantom at the Wedding …
You will REALLY enjoy Adele’s collection based on the family history of Eastern European Jewish immigrants! They encouraged me because their humor and commitment to worshiping and thanking GOD in the face of incredibly horrible circumstances including famine held fast no matter what tortures they faced … mostly man, behaving like beasts, made. Yes, the years of the Holocaust DID take place and don’t EVER let anyone try to deny it to you!
Blessings on EVERYONE until we touch base again next week. I use Tuesday dates but often post before that on www.xanga.com/CampMumma and www.Facebook.com/Darlene J. Ranck Mumma.
djrMum
Monday, 19 October 2009
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Notes on ... Protecting Your Teen from Today's Witchcraft ...
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Corn & Alfalfa Hay, Trucking, Day Care, Van Transport, ESL Tutoring, Prayer Support, Random Poems
60 + 4 new hatchlings Warbling Canaries, 10 + 2 Caprines, 3 Felines, +Worms/Bait Fish/Crickets/Shrimp
JoDa-NeTaDaAaEtRy-*-JoLoAnTaKyAl-JoMeAlMa-*-LoJoHaLa Campers
(John) & Darlene June (Ranck) Mumma, 6 children, 51 international students and 45 MH/MR foster teens and children
580 Mumma Road, Lititz PA 17543-9403 (717) 626-4359
www.Xanga.com/CampMumma www.Facebook.com/Darlene J. Ranck Mumma DJRMum@dejazzd.com
Hello Friend! Notes on … PROTECTING Your Teen from Today’s WITCHCRAFT ,,,
A parent’s Guide to Confronting WICCA and the Occult … by Steve Russo October 20, 2009
Introduction … Well, you got the courage to read these notes, and now you’re probably wondering what you got yourself into – let alone if you should tell your friends that you’re reading notes on a book about witchcraft!! This book was NOT written to scare or alarm anyone. It’s designed to inform and equip you to deal with a very serious issue affecting teens today. The world of witchcraft is a difficult one to navigate through and understand. Parents want practical answers on how to deal with this issue in a sane, reasonable way. And that’s why this book was written!
There’s more coming at teens today than any previous generation. They are searching for answers to the spiritual dimension of life. That can take them many different directions as they look for power to face the difficult issue of life. The influence of witchcraft can be found in many places and forms – from comic books to prime-time TV. Wicca classes are available on the internet. Some of their precepts are positive including taking care of the environment. Some wonder what can be so bad about Wicca? Kids are curious but the ALL never was and never will be our Yahweh Creator God! The god and goddess who “birthed” the earth never were and never will be any of the Three in One Father, Son and Holy Spirit Godhead Who created all universes in six days and rested on the seventh day! For many more details read this book for yourself. You’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain!
Chapter 1 … Guess Who’s Into the Craft? … You may be saying, “Hey, wait a minute, Steve, my son or daughter would never get involved with witchcraft. After all, we go to church every Sunday and they attend youth group activities.” Don’t be so sure! Wicca can be appealing because it has a tolerance for everyone and everything. It encourages care for the environment and your neighbors.
You can pick and choose what you want to believe. You can design your own religion. You can get answers AND power, some say! Some teens are saying those in the Christian church don’t even know why they are attending church OR what they believe! Teens want answers! Have they seen ALL the evidence for the authenticity of the Bible? There are at least six major ways in which Wicca differs from Christianity and other religions:
. worship of the goddess and god;
. spiritual reverence for the earth;
. acceptance of magick (“k” is included when not a person doing magic tricks)
. acceptance of reincarnation
. rejection of moral absolutes appeals to human naturally rebellious nature
. lack of proselytizing activities (trying to get someone to change their religious beliefs)
You can find Wicca evidence in PC games, movies, hand-held games, music, prime time TV, cartoons and books!
Chapter 2 … What’s the World of a Teenager Really Like? … Today’s society promotes sex to sell everything from vitamins to cars to burgers. This is a list of today’s teens’ concerns:
. educational achievements
. financial needs related to current family hardships
. stress and pressure of juggling multiple tasks and performing well
. problems with friends, relational difficulties with parents and family members
. substance abuse, time pressures, and restraints
. career concerns, physical threats
. personal financial problems
. health issues
How is a parent supposed to connect all of these dots? How do they make sense of it all? Work at listening carefully to their dreams, ideas, and the way they react to opportunities. Don’t nitpick at their views but keep good dialogue open.
Chapter 3 … Dabbling in the Darkness? … Why is playing with fire attractive to some? Because we are forbidden because we could burn down the house? Tapping into the supernatural is seductive. Doorways to the dark are: horoscopes, Ouija boards, witchcraft books, palm reading, games featuring psychic elements, fortune telling, use of psychic powers, séance participation, visiting a medium or other spiritual guide, not including a pastor, priest or rabbi, trying to cast a spell or mix a magical potion, assault and degradation of women.
Satan appears as an angel of light until we are committed to him, then he reveals his horrid, frightening, real appearance. Steve includes a LONG list of occultic games. How shall parents protect our teens?
. stay informed … especially regarding materials and methods used in school classrooms
. get involved … become a volunteer aide in your child’s classroom
. gather support … seek out teachers, counselors, parents, pastors and other with your same concerns
. take action when necessary … if the administration ignores your concerns go to the school board with prepared thoughts, documented arguments and prepared to request everything in writing
. accept responsibility for the parenting of your teen … their education is YOUR job when needing correction! Do not allow despair, occultism, mutilation and witchcraft to become entrenched in the vulnerable minds of our youth!
Chapter 4 … Trends of Today … fashions fit for the fire, screams from the screen, chemical catastrophies and substance abuse, dancing in the dark, surfing the web, Harry Potter and friends, magick, spells, sorcery, immorality and sex, coarse language and swearing, murder and violence, or the demonic spirit in your child’s room. Help them dwell on “whatever is true” and as you do, the light will overpower the darkness causing the enemy’s seduction to FAIL!!!
Chapter 5 … What’s the Appeal? … Silver Ravenwolf has been married for 19 years and is the mother of four children. She claims to be an average mom but is one of the most famous witches in the United States today. She writes, “Witchcraft is nothing to worry about. Celebrate that your child seeks empowerment. You can use any of these techniques IN your OWN religious background! Don’t panic, design Wicca WITH your own beliefs!”
Here are some of the fascinating qualities Wicca offers: tolerance, environmental concerns, flexible and personal involvement, power, not list of “Thou Shall Nots”, sexual equality, improved visibility and public perception. The book includes an extensive glossary of Wicca terms. Most Wiccans refuse to submit to any centralized authority and are against any organized belief system. They see truth as relative and rely heavily on experience.
Greater and Lesser Sabbats are practiced as well as several special days during the year including October 31, February 2, April 30 and August 1 or 2. Greek, Roman, Hindu, Egyptian, Buddhist and Celtic gods are included. There is no real agreement as to the roots of Wicca. Some say it descends from the ancient Druids and Celts, others say it started within the last fifty or sixty years. Others say it is at least 25,000 to 35,000 years old. Writings on witches and witchcraft started about the third century. Wicca and Satanism have the same root – denial of the truth – but after that they are very different. Wiccans view Satanism as a distortion of the relatively “young” Christian religion. Wicca is part of the neopagan movement attempting to revive the gods and goddesses and nature religions of ancient cultures.
Chapter 6 … Today’s Witchcraft … The need for power and the cone of power seduce our teens today. Crystals, stones, herbs, candles, colors, cords, words, chats, poetry, techniques and objects are used in magick rituals. Wiccan witches would say their magick is performed for positive ends. There is the magick circle usually in the temple and one simple rule: “An ye harm none, do what ye will.” It is a girl-friendly religion with feminine divinities.
It is quite like the New Age Movement in several ways. All is One, One Is All (Monism). God is Everything. Everything is God (Pantheism). All of the Wiccan confusion can be clarified … the remainder of the book addresses this.
Chapter 7 … Have You Lost Your Identity? … How NOT to find out who you are! Telling me your name, where you live or work, your stock-market portfolio, or what you like to do for recreation are all things ABOUT you. But even with all that information, you still haven’t told me who you really are! Who we are is NOT determined by what we do, where we live, work, or even the stuff we possess. This book’s author is a drummer but when he tells people he is no longer a drummer but is in full-time ministry, they don’t know how to react.
Our TRUE identity IN Christ is established when we receive Jesus Christ into our heart and life. II Corinthians 5:17 describes our identity as a NEW life IN Christ! The old life is gone! A new life has begun! Our identity is WHO we ARE, NOT what we do or what we own! When we are re-born spiritually, we receive eternal life. It was NOT there before our salvation experience. God makes us the person HE designed us to be! Our sin has been totally forgiven. We are not rehabilitated or reformed … we are a radically different person on the INSIDE! This transforms how we act.
Chapter 8 … Religion Any Way You Want It … Our human nature REBELS against any rules and regulations we don’t like. WE ask what is in it for US! Here are reasons our teen will want to surrender his or her life to Jesus … things that affect their life here on earth:
. All of our needs can be met (Psalm 34:10; Matthew 6:33)
. Wherever you go, whatever you do, you will be blessed (Deuteronomy 28:1-6)
. Forgiveness (Colossians 1:14)
. Help in times of trouble (Genesis 18:14; Psalm 118:5)
. Meaning in life (John 10:10)
. Adoption into God’s family (John 1:12)
. Power to face challenges in life (Philippians 4:13)
. Peace (Philippians 4:7)
. Hope (Psalm 42:5; Hebrews 6:19)
. Direction for life (Psalm 25:8-11)
. Protection (Psalm 18:2,3)
. Purpose in life (Esther 4:13,14; Jeremiah 29:11)
. You are never alone (Hebrews 13:5)
. Joy to rise above your circumstances (John 15:11)
. Unconditional love (John 3:16; 13:27,28)
Neither I nor my teen will survive by trying to “Have it our own way”. Our way will bring us up empty-handed! Our choice is to either worship something we’ve created OR worship the Savior WHO created everything and understands us better than anyone EVER could! The Yahweh Creator GOD of the Bible is the only ONE Who can SATISFY our deepest needs and help us to become the person we are designed to be. Where we stand on these three questions will determine our destiny. Do you trust the Bible? Does God exist? Who do you say Jesus is? The rest of our life or our teen’s life on this planet and all of eternity is on the line!
Chapter 9 … Why, God? … One in ten American women takes an antidepressant drug, and the use of such drugs by all adults has nearly tripled in the last decade, according to the federal government’s latest figures on American health. Clearly we are struggling to handle PAIN! Weather catastrophes and daily accidents and stressful aging of our bodies take a toll on our emotional and psychological health. Adam and Eve CHOSE to disobey God introducing SIN into our earth. We choose to sin continuing the pattern of rebellion.
We simply CANNOT blame God for human disasters resulting from our CHOICE to defy God! We drive a vehicle under the influence of whatever and cause incredible loss to life and limb for INNOCENT victims! Every one of us WILL face PAIN of extravagant proportions … it’s a FACT of life! FAITH in God’s CHARACTER: that He IS Who He says He is … the I AM Who I AM of eternity … the EVIDENCE of things we cannot see in Hebrews 11:1. In our pain we simply MUST make Jesus our first resource rather than our last resort! Confidence in God negates doubt … another tool of our enemy, Satan also known by numerous names throughout Scripture including liar and the devil.
Chapter 10 … Fact, Fiction, or Feeling: Whose WORD Am I Going to Trust? … The Bible is NOT a collection of stories, myths, fables, or simple human ideas about God! It’s NOT a human book according to II Timothy 3:16. The Holy WORD of GOD was given to 40 writers of 66 books originally written in Hebrew, Aramaic and Greek on three continents (Asia, Africa, and Europe). It is unified in its diversity and is completely TRUSTWORTHY! Those languages impart endless TRUTH, a revelation of God Himself for eternity past, present and future. There is NO more inspiring writing than Holy Scripture, an unmatched resource for our own encouragement in time of grief and loss!
The Bible is the most UNIQUE book ever written. It is one continuous drama from Genesis to revelation – the rescue of humanity. It has a central THEME … the Person of our Lord Jesus Christ, the ONLY remedy for our sin problem. Romans 6:23 assures us that “the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of god is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.” Horrendous persecution continues to this moment around the globe taking the lives of God’s people! The Bible is now available in more than 2200 languages of the 6000 known languages of the earth! Satan knows we are in the last times and he is an already defeated foe so he is busier than ever with deception and corruption globally!
Chapter 11 … Parenting a Digital Generation … Does our parenting (or coaching or mentoring) style need some improvement? 1. Get in touch with our kids … 2. Learn to listen … 3. Work at understanding … 4. Be a source of encouragement … 5. Give them boundaries … 6. Choose your battles … 7. Love them genuinely. The big “H”, HYPOCRISY, must END! Our example must match our verbal instructions! Live a genuine life before them!
Chapter 12 … When Your Teen Is Into Wicca … Check the book for exhaustive warning signs of Wiccan involvement or Satanic or occultic or drug and alcohol paraphernalia. The book is available at the Christian Library of Lancaster.
Conclusion … Protecting Your Teen … Be prepared to show your children and teens the way to Jesus. Cultivate a spiritually healthy family. Help your children and teens develop a Biblical world view. Celebrate your teens’ uniqueness. Maintain an environment of love and forgiveness. Establish consistent family devotions. Make prayer a priority. Commit yourself to do whatever it takes to protect your family from today’s witchcraft, and you’ll be glad you did! Two appendices and an unmatched glossary complete Steve Russo’s awesome work noted above!
Blessings on EVERYONE until we touch base again next week. I use Tuesday dates but often post before that on www.xanga.com/CampMumma and www.Facebook.com/Darlene J. Ranck Mumma.
djrMum
Monday, 12 October 2009
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Notes on ... DISCONNECTED ... Parenting Teens in a MySpace World ...
Hello from JoDaNeLoMeLo ASSOCIATES ... Monday is COLUMBUS DAY !!! He made many GREAT discoveries and may we NEVER forget his tenacity in FINDING the NEW WORLD for religious FREEDOM!
Corn & Alfalfa Hay, Trucking, Day Care, Van Transport, ESL Tutoring, Prayer Support, Random Poems
60 + 4 new hatchlings Warbling Canaries, 10 + 2 Caprines, 3 Felines, +Worms/Bait Fish/Crickets/Shrimp
JoDa-NeTaDaAaEtRy-*-JoLoAnTaKyAl-JoMeAlMa-*-LoJoHaLa Campers
(John) & Darlene June (Ranck) Mumma, 6 children, 51 international students and 45 MH/MR foster teens and children
580 Mumma Road, Lititz PA 17543-9403 (717) 626-4359
www.Xanga.com/CampMumma www.Facebook.com/Darlene J. Ranck Mumma DJRMum@dejazzd.com
Hello Friend! Notes on … DISCONNECTED ,,, by Chap Clark + Dee Clark ... October 13, 2009
… Parenting Teens in a MySpace* World … One TOUGH book to summarize! …
EVERY word in this book is helpful so to avoid the risk of sounding like “one size fits all”, check this book out first person for specific details
Chap Clark has also written hurt … Inside the World of Today’s TEENAGERS and conducts HURT seminars. Ralph Winter, producer of Star Trek IV and VI, and X-Men says of Chap’s writing: “This book does a great job of framing the issues affecting adolescents. It provided me with some powerful insights. No wonder adolescents identify with the movies I have been making — the characters are on the same journey of trying to find hope and authenticity. This book is a great look inside the adolescent world, the world beneath the one exposed to adults.”
Chap is professor of Youth, Family, and Culture at Fuller Theological Seminary and is speaker, trainer, consultant and president of ParenTeen as well as author of more than sixteen books. Coauthor of three books Dee is president of Healing Reins, Inc. training professional counselors for equine-assisted therapy. Chap and Dee have been married over 26 years and have three grown children. They make their home in Gig Harbor WA and can be contacted at www.ParenTeen.com.
Part I: Understanding Today’s Adolescent Journey … Adolescence began because society was too busy and preoccupied to assimilate its young. Adolescence lengthened as adults abandoned the call to love and nurture their children into adulthood. Today’s kids have been deeply wounded, and it is up to parents and the body of Christ to turn the tide of “systemic abandonment” (expanded below). God’s call is to do this by inviting our kids into the kind of community they were created to know and experience. As you lead and love your child, or someone else’s child, know that the God of creation and the Lord of mercy goes before you!
1. Holding On for Dear Life: The Times, They Are A-Changin’ … Your child is not a problem to be
solved, but a creative, talented, and unique gift to be understood, embraced, and ultimately set free. Change is our children’s one constant in life. Parents need to put their personal agendas on the back burner. Being the best parent you can be means empowering, encouraging, comforting and cheering your child on to be the unique person he or she was created to be.
2. The Power of Love … When you wipe away all of the layers, issues, and questions that we face as
parents, in the long run the only question that matters is, “Is who I am, how I live, and how I parent providing my child the very best chance to see and experience the Jesus who died to redeem them?” Nothing will ever be more important for you to consider as you love and lead your child. There is a “separation” myth that teens desire to “separate” from their parents and cling to their friends as they move out of childhood and begin the adolescent journey of preparing for eventual adulthood. In almost every case your child desperately wants to stay close to you. To some this seems like a contradiction, but it doesn’t have to be. Your child’s perspective of their own world ultimately has the greatest influence over them as they grow up.
3. Love That Connects … Charles Swindoll says “Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.” Chap shares this poem he found while house-sitting for some friends:
DAUGHTER 17 (author unknown) … Could be SON 17 too!
I have a daughter 17 … When she lies to me … I love her.
When she disappoints me … I love her.
When she doesn’t live up to my expectations … I love her.
When she reflects poorly on my name … I love her.
“Now I can understand how when she pleases you …
and obeys you … and fulfills you …,” you say.
But that’s not what I’m talking about.
It’s when she does NONE of these things … I love her
AND for a very simple reason: I’m her father … and she’s my child.
4. The History and Meaning of Growing Up … Society transferred the responsibility of nurturing
guiding, and ultimately assimilating the young from society itself to children. Kids are essentially on their own to become adults, and this is now true in nearly every modern culture around the world. How does an adolescent know who they are? By what criteria do they define themselves? That is the central task of identity for adolescents: to discover the person they are as they attempt to insert and assimilate themselves into adult society.
5. The Changing Nature of Every Child’s Journey into Adulthood … A Rabbinical saying reminds us:
Don’t limit a child to your own learning, for he was born in another time. Erma Bombeck notes: When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out. What happens to the kids? Where did they go? To the world “beneath”, which, by the way, is alive and well and becoming far more sophisticated and protective every year. The world “beneath” refers to the long safe relational place mid-adolescents believe they have left – other kids. It is their own world where they do not feel they will be hassled or judged. It is a place to attempt to regroup in order to head out into the high-pressure world of adult expectations. The sad thing is the extent to which they will go and the sometimes poor choices they will make to find peers who seem to accept them.
6. Systemic Abandonment: Or, How Did We Get Here? … Adulthood is not reached until these three
basic, interrelated tasks have been completed: (1) the discovery of identity, (2) the acceptance of healthy autonomy, and (3) the ability and willingness to connect to others in community. This is the process of becoming a unique person or individual. Adolescence was initially a couple of years but has grown past seven or eight years to about FIFTEEN years into the mid-twenties! The authors did not mention this but this letter writer is thinking that the home-school movement as well as the Christian school “system” is addressing this abandonment issue without the fear of over protection, a charge Satan uses to accuse us! He also deceives many through the sickness of molestation and other abuses of our children and youth by “adults” or peers who’ve often been abused too by those they should have been able to trust. May this book help to negate Satan’s efforts to destroy God’s safe plan for families! Read it!!
Part II: Parenting through the Seasons … Each stage responds to “systemic abandonment” differently … Systems of family, school, neighborhood, and friends can fragment and no longer provide the youth with the confidence of long term friendship or accountability. The alienation, loneliness and rejection that results develops what these authors are calling “systemic abandonment” a quite serious setting for the development of the mid adolescent’s emotional and psychological adjustments throughout the years of “tween” and teen development.
7. The Five Tasks of Parenting … understanding … showing compassion … boundarying …
charting/guiding … launching into adulthood. The following chapters expand these tasks for each season of parenting.
8. Parenting through the Seasons: Childhood … A child’s greatest fear is being alone and not having
anyone to understand him or her. A child needs a secure anchor in parents and a nonjudgmental listening ear from them. Parents need to become a student of each child’s story. Our children need a home that is stable, safe, warm, gentle, calm (processing anger well) and fun with parents truly maturely in charge.
9. Parenting through the Seasons: Early Adolescence … Ages 11/12 through 14/15 … During this
season the best we can offer our children is a sense of security, confidence, and grounding as they prepare to spend the next decade on that precarious adolescent TIGHTROPE! We can encourage, comfort and urge as a fan each step of the way. Compassionate parenting includes three fundamental roles: a listener, a guide and a negotiator. Create an environment where faith is “felt”. Be a seed planter. Connect abstract faith to hands-on service. Authentically model your faith. Build an extended Christ-centered family.
10. Parenting through the Seasons: Mid Adolescence … Ages 14/15 through 19/21 … Understanding
and Showing Compassion in the face of Egocentric Abstraction (inability to recognize the nuances and complexities that come with life in a fallen world) … Boundarying and Charting the Course … High school is DIFFERENT from ten years ago! Early and Late Adolescence can only stretch so far. As these stages lengthened a Mid Adolescence HAD to cover the gaps between! As societies around the world have become increasingly fragmented, with everybody pushed and pulled in multiple directions, there has been a subtle yet steady erosion of our collective commitment to proactively assimilating our children and adolescents into adult society. This culture-wide lack of intentional support and guiding nurture has created an innate insecurity in the souls of our kids.
The coach who yells at the clumsy 8-year-old … the Sunday School teacher who kicked the student out of the class on Jesus’ love because he was chewing gum and she was playing with her hair … the school teacher who taped the student’s mouth to shut him up … the parents who forced their kids to lie about their divorce to family, neighbors and friends … these authors have heard it all. Parental dishonesty, infidelity, abuse and neglect influence more than the couples’ own children. The “system” of family and neighborhood accountability needs to be restored in our culture to prevent “systemic abandonment”.
11. Parenting through the Seasons: Late Adolescence, Emerging Adulthood, the Launching of a
Young Adult … Ages 19/21 through Mid 20s? … Strengthening the Scaffolding for a Lifelong Faith … A late adolescent needs to know that others see their emerging calling take shape and to hear them regularly name it, even when they don’t yet quite see it themselves. For so many parents, the faith journey is primarily if not exclusively focused on pouring into our own kids’ lives. We treat them like adults while training them, being a committed friend offering timely guidance and sharing who it is that they are becoming.
As important as this is, if the family is the only place we live out our call as followers of Christ, we rob our kids of the best the Gospel has to offer them. We have been designed to sing and serve and cry with Jesus as He accomplishes His Kingdom work through us. The greatest satisfaction any parent can know is to stand arm in arm with their child, serving together in the name of Jesus!
12. Six Longings of Today’s Adolescents …
What they say … What we hear … What they mean …
“You don’t KNOW me.” ……………………… I don’t matter to her/him. …………………………… “I long to belong.”
a. Acknowledge that you care about them.
b. Let them know that it sounds to you like they may have some deep feelings going on that you may have triggered.
c. Let them know you want to know more about why they feel the way they do.
d. Let them know you’d love to sit and talk with them when they are ready.
“You never listen to me.” …………… He doesn’t want to listen to ME. ……………… “I long to be taken seriously.”
This will come across with several variations … most often nonverbal … rolling eyes, folded arms, a look of boredom or exasperation in response to what they see as “lecture mode”. Having an authentic, two-way, respectful, and honoring dialogue is the greatest gift any two people can give each other. Slow down.
“I can do it!” ………………………………………… He/she doesn’t need me. ……………………………… “I long to matter.”
Time and discreet guidance are needed to discover unique identity, develop autonomy and explore calling and giftedness. Do not meet an adolescent as an adult, but not as a young child either. As an adolescent spreads his or her wings in decision-making parents need to be there for him or her, to listen, guide, and yes, boundary. A balance is critical between over-control and under-control.
“I’m fine, okay?” ……………………………… He wants to be left alone. ………………………… “I long for a safe place.”
Adolescent moodiness and emotions are MORE than mere biology or “hormones”! Chemical balance as well as emotional and psychological stability develop at varying paces. For BOTH genders “how they see themselves” influences EVERYTHING! Addressing confusion and insecurities when a tween or teen requests/demands space requires center stream navigation … ignoring them until the “funk” dissipates can read out as rejection and demanding a solution NOW can be viewed as rejecting their need for freedom to work things out in their own time frame. It is vital to interpret correctly the underlying longings.
“It’s my life!” …………………………… She/He doesn’t care what I think. …………………… “I long to be uniquely me.”
DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY!!! … at any age! Don’t send an email in the heat of the moment! Our lives are filled with history and subtexts that frame the true underlying message. Timing is crucial, facial expressions critical at a time when years of delicate parental pruning are on the line. “I’m outta here at 18” and “Good, I’ll help you pack” camouflage the core “I need to be uniquely me, and I feel like nobody’s helping me to become myself. And I don’t even know who this ME is!” An attack or a defense can mean “I am so alone in trying to figure out who I am; PLEASE don’t get in my way. My life’s hard enough without having to worry about pleasing you. I’m overwhelmed by it all right now and I need to be able to breathe!”
“Nobody cares about me.” ……… He doesn’t care about ANYBODY but himself. ………… “I long to be wanted.”
We’ve all had a “pity party” or two. Whining manipulatively wears out fast. It’s difficult to determine when “getting played” or “being allowed into that tender part of a child’s soul where they are scared or sad” is predominant. Sometimes repeated self-loathing or self-deprecating messages and behaviors may be BOTH manipulative AND at the same time an unveiling of the deeper PAIN. These authors suggest both can be true in almost every case! Just as our Creator God wants us to love Him for WHO He is and not for WHAT He does, we need to love each other for WHO we are, NOT with performance criteria!
13. Parenting as Partnership: The Three Levels of Partnership …
Typically we start by making a list of what is most important in life, something like this: God, then Family, then Job, then Church, then Life. However, this type of linear priority checklist may not be very helpful. It may actually be negative as we try to faithfully follow Jesus, love our spouses, parent our kids, stay involved at church, and eventually, if we have time, live our lives!
Life from the Center is a life of unhurried peace and power. It is serene. It is amazing. It is triumphant. It is radiant. It takes no time, but occupies all our time. And it makes our life programs new and overcoming. We need not get frantic. He is at the helm. And when our little day is done, we lie down quietly in peace, for all is well … according to Thomas Kelly in A Testament of Devotion.
Level ONE of Partnering is Trusting the Spirit. It is a Circle of relationship between me and Jesus Christ. Without this we are NOT ready to parent! We learn what it means to have Christ living IN us and from the depths of who I am living out that relationship by pouring into the others whom God has granted me. “The Spirit helps us in our weakness,” Paul tells us. We focus on God’s agenda rather than ours.
Level TWO of Partnering includes our spouse. In marriage there are first three Circles of Relationship: You and Jesus Christ, Me and Jesus Christ and We and Jesus Christ. God planned for each child to have a mother and a father as parents. Eve was Adam’s “ezer”, partner and companion in responsibility. Then additional Circles of Relationship include each child or children.
Level THREE of Partnering has additional Circles of Relationship for each “soul mate” partner. In order to counteract the cultural abandonment our children have experienced, we need to offer them another layer of consistent support: lifelong adult soul mates. As carefully selected other adults for this ministry are drawn around the family these close and trusted friends are included in our journey for the long haul. Six families can be accountable to each other through a mini-community helping one another grow and mature. This network of relationships is vital for transitioning children to adulthood.
As church-based small groups tend to slide in the couples direction, a single parent can ask your pastor or friends at church to help you find both men and women to walk alongside you over the years. This helps to fulfill God’s promise to be a “father to the fatherless” and a “mother to the motherless” for your child or peer.
Blessings on EVERYONE until we touch base again next week. I use Tuesday dates but often post before that on www.xanga.com/CampMumma and www.Facebook.com/Darlene J. Ranck Mumma.
Tuesday, 06 October 2009
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Notes on ... ENOUGH by Gayle Roper ...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY Haley Jade for this Friday, October 9th!!!
JoDaNeLoMeLo ASSOCIATES
Corn & Alfalfa Hay, Trucking, Day Care, Van Transport, ESL Tutoring, Prayer Support, Random Poems
64 Warbling Canaries, 6 Caprines, 3 Felines, +Worms/Bait Fish/Crickets/Shrimp/Dough
JoDa-NeTaDaAaEtRy-*-JoLoAnTaKyAl-JoMeAlMa-*-LoJoHaLa Campers
(John) & Darlene June (Ranck) Mumma, 6 children, 51 international students and 45 MH/MR foster teens and children
Nevin John (2/1) & Tammy Elizabeth (Killinger) (8/4) Mumma, Darin Curtis (2/9/99), Aaron Jeffrey (2/9/99), Ethan Gabriel (8/3/00), Ryan Daniel (9/6/07)
John Dechsontayea (11/23) & Lori Lynn (Mumma) (1/18) Young, * 1st (6/29/94), Anthony John (10/2/95), Taylor Shawn (9/17/98), Kyle Ian (4/29/03), Alex Shane (9/8/05)
Jonathan Paul (5/1) and Melodi Ruth (Mumma) (1/10) Miller, Aliya Renee (7/6/06) and Mariah Elizabeth (4/24/08)
Lowell Seth (11/29) and Jolene Linette (Martin) (9/13) Mumma, Haley Jade (10/9/07) and Landon Dale (10/3/08)
* represents miscarriages Uncle Karlin Shem 6/29/1970 & Aunt Harmoni Miriam 12/29/1978
580 Mumma Road, Lititz PA 17543-9403 (717) 626-4359
www.Xanga.com/CampMumma www.Facebook.com/Darlene J. Ranck Mumma DJRMum@dejazzd.com
Hello Friend! Notes on … ENOUGH by Gayle Roper … October 6, 2009
“I’ve had it with those ungrateful teenagers, and I’ll not take it anymore!”
Did (Do) you ever so frustrate your parents (grandparents) that you enjoy(ed) it? Did (Do) you allow your anger to destroy important relationships? Did (Do) you deny being angry? Do you have a sane plan to address anger? I rarely read fiction but this book caught my attention at the Christian Library of Lancaster so I read straight through it! I won’t give away the plot but here is the intro from the back cover of the book.
Molly Gregory has taken care of EVERYTHING. Trouble is, no one seems to know it – till Molly takes drastic action! All she wants is a little respect. A little appreciation. Some token of acknowledgement that her three teens see her as more than their personal chef, chauffeur, and maid. It’s not as if she’s asking for the moon!
When Molly finds herself having to deal with a stubborn father-in-law and a grieving mother on top of her three inconsiderate children, she decides to take a stand for right, rest, and mothers everywhere. Something’s got to give – and this time, it’s not going to be she! Encouraged by her husband Pete, Molly announces to her children that she’s staging a walkout: no cooking, no laundry, no cleaning, no chauffeuring her kids around until they recognize how much she does for them and learn to honor her.
With Molly on strike, life in the Gregory household quickly dissolves into hilarious chaos. How long will pandemonium reign before the kids cry “uncle”? Gayle Roper has always loved stories and has authored more than 35 books. A popular speaker at women’s events and writer’s conferences, Roper lives with her husband, Chuck, in Pennsylvania. They have two grown sons, two lovely daughters-in-law, and the worlds’ five most wonderful grandchildren. This book is a GREAT read for tweens as well as teens!
Here is a summary of the GREGORY FAMILY CONTRACT based on the Roper Family Contract … I’ve added a couple of notes from Camp Mumma Contracts with our children as well as our international and foster teens.
I. Our Principles …
A. Because this is our home, its care and keeping are our responsibility.
B. Our home will be based on Christian principles.
1. Parents: "These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up" (Deut.6:6-7).
2. Children: "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 'Honor your father and mother'— which is the first commandment with a promise— 'that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth'" (Eph.6:l-3).
3. In accordance with Scripture, the parents have the last word, though the children's views will be listened to and carefully considered.
II. Our Patterns
A. General responsibilities
1. Each person will keep his or her bedroom or part thereof clean and ordered. Weekly checks will be made.
2. Each person will hang up and put away his or her own clothes.
3. Each person will dispose of his or her snack mess.
4. Each person will clean up his or her own bathroom debris and dirt.
5. Each person will put away all his or her belongings daily
a. Any items left in the public part of the house at bedtime will go in the Dump Box.
b. Items may be retrieved from the Dump Box upon payment of a twenty-five cent fine per item,
c. All monies collected will go into a fund to take the family out to dinner.
B. Specific Responsibilities
1. Dad …
a. will oversee upkeep and repairs about the house.
b. will spend time with each and all of us.
c. will take one kid per month out to dinner at a restaurant (reasonable) of the kid's choice.
2. Mom …
a. will buy food and provide meals.
1. To be served at 7:00 a.m., 12:00 p.m., and 6:30
2. All are expected to be present unless stated in advance.
3. Guests are welcome with prior notice.
4. Those absent without notice …
a. won't eat.
b. will oversee housekeeping tasks,
c. will oversee chauffeur services—twenty-four hour advance notice is requested,
d. will do family laundry.
1. All dirty clothes are kept in hampers.
2. Each person must bring his or her own clothes to the laundry room on laundry day and return them to their room after wash,
3. will continue to develop and market needlework.
3. Amie …
a. will care for the living room and dining room— sweeping and dusting twice weekly.
b. will be responsible for the sewing and maintenance of her wardrobe.
c. will help with the preparation of dinner.
d. will make her own lunches.
e. will fold her laundered clothes.
4. PJ. …
a. will care for the family room—sweeping, dusting,
and tidying as needed,
b. will care for the cats.
1. Feed and water daily.
2. Change litter boxes weekly
c. will oversee Dump Box and fines,
d. will make his own lunches,
e. will fold his laundered clothes.
5.Jordan …
a. will collect newspapers and empty the kitchen trash daily.
b. will take all trash down for collection weekly,
c. will carry in the groceries,
d. will make his own lunches,
e. will fold his laundered clothes.
C. Rotating Responsibilities of Children:
Setting and clearing the table and loading the dishwasher will be done monthly on a rotating basis.
D. Seasonal Responsibilities of Children:
Seasonal chores like mowing the grass, shoveling the walk and drive, and raking the leaves will be assigned by the parents and are viewed as opportunities to earn extra spending money.
NOTE: Failure to comply with these patterns may result in:
1. curtailment of allowance.
2. suspension of social or special privileges such as driving.
3. other disciplines as necessary.
Signed: family participantDear Reader: … from Author Gayle Roper,
I remember very clearly how tough it was raising our two boys, now both young, married family men. My husband Chuck and I talked long and hard about what our patterns for our home would be. We dissected our parents' methods. We read books. We watched and listened. We talked with other parents.
But we always remembered one principle: God gave the authority in the home to the parents, not to the children. It is the parents' responsibility to open doors of opportunity and set boundaries beyond which the children may not go.
As God, the Perfect Parent, doesn't say yes to all our whims, neither should we to our kids. As God will go toe-to-toe with us when we disobey, so must we face necessary confrontations. But God also always listens; God always has time for us. God always loves us and forgives us.
Through prayer (lots of it!), searching of Scriptures, assessing the abilities and gifts of each child and spending great quantities of time with each one, parents guide and train. Chores like in the Gregory Family Contract (which is modeled after the Roper Family Contract) are just one part of a healthy growing-up, along with laughter and serious talks and vacations and summer jobs and the frequent, firm no at the candy counter.Blessings on EVERYONE until we touch base again next week. I use Tuesday dates but often post before that on www.xanga.com/CampMumma and www.Facebook.com/Darlene J. Ranck Mumma. You are welcome to "unsubscribe" at any time if you'd rather catch the letter on line!djrMum
CampMumma
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- Name: CampMumma
- Gender: Female
- Member Since: 7/15/2008
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About Me
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Agricultural Family with Hay, Corn, Goats and Original Canary Island Warbling Canaries, Biblical Faith and Prayer Support very important, Bible Teacher and ESL Tutor, Live Bait Shop, Mother of Six, Mother-in-Law of Four, Child Care especially Grandchildren, Love Making Music and Reading; In touch with Missionaries, Church Alumni, Extended Family, Our Amish Community and other Neighbors; Can memorize best to a tune, Interested in healthy nutrition especially raw whole goat milk for banana blender ice cream, growing stevia and pennywort and chocolate mint tea prepared RAW.
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